A Reason!

I was going to post on how I would love to just beat the fool to a pulp who stole the wheel off my bike. How I would like to just shatter his knee caps and give him a couple of thousand swift kicks to the hurtful parts! This happened Saturday night. Sunday around 11:30 I walked my one wheeled bike all the way to Davis Square in Somerville from Medford. My plan was to go to Bike Boom and see if they have a new wheel. Place opens at 10am per their website. Get there at around noon and they are not open until 2 pm. I walk it further to Wheelworks. $90 later and I have a new wheel on my bike. Being pissed about things I was informed by the guy who fixed my bike that they didn't break into my apartment and steal my bike and records. Yeah that didn't happen but it doesn't bring my wheel back. I mean I got to pet the sweetest sad eyed puppy dog I ever seen but still I walked a mile and a half with my one wheeled bike before fixing it.

On Monday, I ended up in Boston Brewin Coffee and ended up bring up the story about my bike. He said that sometimes things happen for a reason. The wheel could have popped on my way somewhere else. Also the person who stole it could have done something good and was able to bike to someone to save their life. I realize it isn't so bad after all.

I also realize I could also be in a worse spot. I could be just like a person from High School who keeps posting on facebook the status of her homelessness and no one to help her. It's truly sad but I wouldn't know how to help a thousand miles away. But then again this could be something to where she will do something with it and help someone else out later in life.

Is this guaranteed?

No

But even with most agnostic and atheist people I've met who in the end think that there is nothing at the end of the rainbow, They for the most part believe this.

There is a reason that I saw that someone else was keeping their mustache for a week for $25. I said this was a great idea and emailed all my friends last night. I'm now stuck with the stache until Mid-January at least!

So every day I have to look at the way things happens at least until the sky starts falling!

Thank you Mr Bivins!

Dear Mr. Matthew Bivins,

I remember seeing you perform with Jump, Little Children for the first time around 16 years ago and being amazed by this instrument called a melodica. It was a keyboard which you blow into. I remember being in Alston back in May when I saw one up close and for sale. I wanted it but decided to hold off. Now though I can't hold off any longer. I bought it. I am now a proud owner of a melodica! Such a proud owner of such a beautiful creation that I can't believe I didn't mail order one 16 years earlier! I'm just sad that I can't find "Opium" or "Easter Parade" on youtube. I wonder if those songs have went up in smoke.

Thanks,

me

Movembersgiving!

This day and Month always seem to be a new awakening for me. It somehow does signify death with the leaves falling off the trees and the air becoming crisply cold. Sunlight falls before 5pm in Massachusetts and it will only get dark earlier. However, I find this as a time of year that I become rejuvenated. I know that December will be cold and snowy but somehow things feel a little off because it has been 70 degrees in Boston today.

I have a lot to give thanks for but I have a lot to give!

This year as have the past three have started with a road race. In the third year in a row this race has been different. This race was my favorite because it was a team effort. Teamwork is important. My friend James organized our team. I can't think of anyone who loves road races more. I can't think of anyone who knows runners and their abilities better than James. The course was uphill for the first couple of miles but I respect it. I am learning to pace myself. Right at the first mile and a half I felt the pain in my side (like I do a lot). However, I could hear my running sensei in my head telling me not to give up. This time I didn't. I did notice my time slipping but at the end there was a nice downhill. At the end my friend Mr. Sony raced me in (he was four minutes faster). It was a great race and I had a great time which would have been an Athlinks.com PR if it wasn't for the extra .05 miles at the end.

Later in the day James, Mr. Sony, Chris, and my roommate all had Thanksgiving at the Rock. I burnt the ham to a blackened char, I almost darkened the mac and cheese, and those onions on the green bean casserole look super dark! The only pizza place that was open set my mouth aflame along with everyone else. The corn casserole was delicious as was the bites. Pumpkin pie with ice cream topped of the night. Then afterwards to Deep Ellum with more friends and good times. It makes me reflect on past thanksgivings and what to be thankful for: Friends and Family.

I remember all of my Thanksgivings for the past seven years I lived here.

Year one: My roommate and I made thanksgiving dinner and hung out on our own. No one else there to stop by but it worked.

Year two: I was by myself this year but I ended up being invited downstairs to our landlord's place. They were a Chilean family and I can't think of another Thanksgiving I will ever have which had tamales and hot peppers.

Year Three: I found out my father had prostate cancer. This wasn't good news to find out. My father also didn't want me to know or worry about him. I knew I had to go home and see him though. This was important. This is the only father I have and I have to see him through this. I know he was going through pain. I know this wasn't easy but knowing friends that have had this happen before I know that I am in a lot of ways lucky to have him alive! He made it through and is healthy today. I am joyous for this occasion. I know that my mustache for Movember is for an important cause. I know that the act of it may just be a little dumb but if one man gets awareness and has the symptoms checked out. It felt like an important visit because I got to see my family and My aunt who didn't survive lung cancer. In the end it let me know how important family really is.

Year Four: Friendsgiving with my roommate, his former girlfriend, and a couple of other friends.

Year Five: I really wanted to volunteer but ended up in Rockland, Ma with a friend. I do wonder if she was spying for the ex-ballbreaker though.

Year Six: I would say this was a transformation year with my life and another. A successful Friendsgiving with a last minute invite. I am grateful to the person who invited me.

Year Seven: See Above.

I have a lot to be thankful for even if there was no Turkey this year. I'm sure I can get some for Christmas. This is a holiday for those you care about and love. This is a holiday for friends and family. My cause for them is very deep. One day there will be a cure for cancer and one day there will be a cure for pain...

Full Circle

I remember six and a half years ago when I decided to write out a list of places I wanted to move to. I was putting Upstate South Carolina in my rear view and not looking back. The list in order of where I wanted to live was as follows:

1. Chicago
2. Charleston, SC (West Virginia is not an option)
3. Asheville, NC
4. Atlanta
5. Tri-city, NC (Raliegh-Durham-Chapel Hill)
6. Columbia, SC (I visited a couple of friends there and realized it wasn't for me)
7. Boston

Irony is that I only put Boston here because my current roommate got a job with a company here and I thought that he could have gotten me on (He did). Therefore six years later I am where I am now. There have of course been a lot of times where I thought I would never make but alas I am still here. However something was quite startling yesterday while shopping at Trader Joe's in Cambridgeport. I ran into the first girl I ever went on a date with in Boston. Do I remember the details of everything? No, but I remember that our first date was at trident and our second date was just down the street at a Tapas place. Somehow she remembers who I am and I vaguely remember who she is. It is vague and I remember the details of how she seemed to be a beautiful socially awkward soul. We caught up for a moment. She said she hadn't seen me in three years but I know it had been six. Regardless I feel like something has completely circled itself. I look and see how I got here and question if it is the way I should get somewhere else. Right now I am not in the same place though my roommate may leave in the spring. Right now I like where I live and I am happy with the people in my life. I'm happy with the outcome of the situation but will I need something more? It's a tough question to ask. I'm finding a book from my past of goals I wanted to attain. Ironically I was more entertained by the letter from a friend I found in it...

The good friends I have down South are not much different than my friends here and if you know me deeply you know my fondness of maps.

So my roommate is gay. Wait! What?!?!?!?!

"So your the roommate you are living with now is gay?" No, not at all, but once upon a time....


I remember four years ago living in East Somerville which I referred to as Slummahville I had a roommate who didn't say much or really make much noise in the house at all. He would usually spend three hours at a time in the restroom. Ironically, I remember the time he took a seven minute shower and he was done. Why? Because the ex-ballbreaker was having a pool party and he was coming. His reasoning for only taking a seven minute shower? He reads for the other two hours and 53 minutes in the bathroom. I thought it was because he used every Burt's bee bottle he had ever had in the shower. There was around 30 bottles in there.

Regardless, his schedule was weird because he got to choose it to be as such. He worked at the state house and would usually go into the office around three each day. This meant he was a night owl. Nothing wrong with that because he never made much noise. He was like the roommate who was not there (in a house of four). So on a Friday night with nothing going on I decided to surprise him and meet him at his favorite restaurant in Cambridge. We ended up talking about life and he started to share a lot of his thoughts about life with me. For some reason I remember that he had mentioned that two of his college guy friends were getting married. For the year I had lived with him there was no such thing as a gaydar going off in the house. It never dawned on me.

So on the drive home things get a little political.

Roommate: "So I believe that gay people should have the same rights as straight people!"

Me: "Yeah, I believe that gay people should have the same rights as we straight people."

Roommate: "What do you mean we?"

SILENCE

I knew at this point he was gay and I was completely OK with it. I mean if I were in an earlier stage in my life I would have said it would have scared me. At this point in my life I knew it was harmless and knew that he was a person trying to survive in this world just like myself.

That is what this blog is though. Stories of people who affect us and even though we may not share a common area every day. Are there more stories about apartments and roommates? Yes, and those people who I would never accept as roommates (sorry). There is also the stories of life. When you share parts of your life with other people in a way you become their roommate. Sometimes its others around you who help you figure out who you are and locate the pieces.

Running Uphill

If I were to have ever write a book it would be titled "Running Saved My Life"! This way I have felt about running for a long time. However I can't say I am a perfect runner. I have my falls, spills, and stops. I remembered when I first started running six years ago. I would do a mile and usually on a treadmill or maybe a little more, two miles at most. Somehow I remember going on a date with a girl in Davis Square who was talking about doing the Feaster Five . I was in amazement of this because I could never see myself going past two miles. I think it was that moment that even though I didn't sign up for a race I was going to do my first three miles on Thanksgiving of 2006. And then it was done, two loops around Jamaica Pond and I met my first running accomplishment. Ironic, that now I do this run distance at the very minimum three times a week with no problems at all (more than three usually but we're talking Burren Mondays, Magoun Thursdays, and TMIRCE Saturdays).

This brings me to where I am now and the crossroads I face. Run Clubs have been a big part of my life. I remember doing the Jim Kane Sugar Bowl 5 miler in 2007 and seeing the black and gold Somerville Road Runners tent. I was intrigued because I had just moved to Somerville. Also, I found out that their run club ran out of Khoury's which was only a block from where I lived. I remember doing my first race there when it was the 4.13 miler. I also experience Winter Hill for the first time. If there is one thing to know about me and running it is one thing, "I HATE HILLS"! It had to had been 90+ degrees out that Thursday. I also saw a portly six year old jumping up and down without wearing an article of clothing on. It was probably one of the more scarring moments of my life. Moral of the story is that I did this run several times throughout the summer and early fall. I don't think I really clicked with many of the people there. They were not bad people at all but I didn't feel that I fit in.

I remember signing up for the Jingle Bell Run in 2008 and seeing that there was a 5k run at Magoun's I decided to go for it. I remember my first run and I must have finished 5th out of 20 runners. I felt fast! I remember taking a cool down run with my running Sensei and a new friend I met. The running Sensei stayed but after a couple of weeks the new friend I would never see again. It's funny because I remember Pauline being the one who brought me into TMIRCE on it's 2nd birthday. After a few weeks I never saw her again. Back to Magoun's and the Somerville Striders. For the first time with a running club I felt like I was at home. It didn't take long to know everyone and to feel like I belonged. It was a good feeling and it made me enjoy running even more.

Do I feel like I am a friend to everyone there? No. But I feel close enough to most that I enjoy it. The friend that would give me a birthday card and a beer, the friend who made sure I got blood pressure medicine when my prescription ran out, the friend who makes sure that snacks are there every week, the friend who shares his experiences from his 1000+ races, the friend who will pull me over after running a summer series race to help him fix a Keg, the friend who is going to run 4 marathons a year in different states, the friends who bring in pictures from roller derby and have over analysis of everything that has ever been roller derby, the one friend who I actually convinced to come to TMIRCE, The friend who offered his home for the best house party in quite a while, the friend who moved to New York, The friend who I can confide my relationship issues with, and the friend who helped me get into the apartment I am in now. These people are important to me. In a sense, this is why I run!

However in the past few months a cancer has subsided over the Somerville Striders. The funny thing is you don't recognize cancer until it has set in and on occasion it may be too late. It's subsided and infested itself quietly on the people I love and care about. It's saddening that no one can truly see it. I could only hope that one day this cancer is found and reckoned with! At this time I can't let it infest me. I will remember all of you and hope are your very best. Maybe one day and soon I can come back on a white horse and everything will be ok!

As for now feel free to high five me when I am running in your opposite direction. My intentions are not to be Judas-like. If you can't meet me in ball square you can always meet me at the corner of Medford and Lowell. My running Sensei says that more girls take this route and maybe I should follow them. Taking Medford to Lowell is easy and it burns me down at the end of it. Running Lowell to Medford will keep me honest, and then there is Winter Hill.

In Stride!

Tonight I decided to do the very first Lululemon run at the pru. It was good to see my fellow friends Andrew, Scott, Chris, Andy, Martin, and Brian. I also ran into a person I have not ran into in a long long time who used to occasionally run with the Somerville Striders and made a couple of new friends tonight. It was a crisp and cool night. A lot of clouds and no stars in sight.

I'm usually one to dart out at the beginning only to be caught up with and passed by a lot. Ask anyone who I feel like most pass me but that isn't always the case. I'll be faster than some. If I wasn't a 250 lb tub of lard in High School then I could have been a 100 meter sprinter. Probably would have won a few races maybe but I can't change the past. I also can't change the fact that gravy was a part of every other meal my mother and father made. However tonight I tried to hold back on the start. I did the chicken dance from Arrested Development. I just tried to take it in stride. For a while I was in the lead. I'm not a super fast runner. I run 5ks in between 22:30 and 24:00. It really depends on how I feel and what I have in me. Tonight was different though. There was a sense of running just to run. No timing, No Garmin, Just the run. And for once it was....Refreshing. I found myself breathing easy and not wanting to stop. I found myself hungry and wanting to keep going. I found myself. I've been dealing with small injuries as of late. My ankle seemed very sore this morning. The top of my left foot has been dealing with tendinitis for the past three weeks. However tonight I was free. I felt that I could have ran forever. I found myself catching up and passing people. It was thrilling and at the end there were some delicious apps waiting at the Back Bay Social Club. It was different than the Guinness stew and pasta that I have accustomed myself to on Mondays for the past year and a half. I feel re-energized. I feel ready. Let's do this. I signed up for Cambridge 5k tonight. This means I won't do the Jingle bell run. I however think if I train and prepare myself well enough then a PR is in order. These things get louder...

The Gatekeeper

So the past couple of weeks have been a couple of sheer misery. I can't hide, can't deny it, sweep it under the rug, set it on fire, or evaporate it.

All I can do is be better.

What would be the cause of my misery?: A girl (isn't it always?)

Why?: Because I had a schoolboy crush on a girl who I thought had a wonderful Childlike demeanor(as in a playful and easy going spirit) and I got to date her. Cloud 10 was my life at that moment in time. But when reality hit, it hit hard. It really hurts when you are told you are "Not just another", then you realize you are "Just Another" and replaced by someone in the same circle (this is a continuous cycle though).

So what does that make me?: John Cusack in a 80s movie who can't keep or get the girl he wants (note this is more "Better off Dead" and not "Say Anything")

What does that make her?: The girl in the John Cusack 80s movie (not Ione Skye) who ditches John Cusack. It could also make her Charlie from "High Fidelity" (Note that John Cusack always ends up with someone who is more awesome in the end).

She was childish, using, deceitful ,and selfish as anyone can be. She will run a million miles and never know who she really is.

Everyone that cares about me has put it this way, "I told you so!"

So on and so forth. Move on and move forward.

How do I better me?:

I have to examine who I am and who I have been:

A runner
A musician
A poet
A writer
A photographer
An actor
A beer brewer
A comedian
A photoshop artist

Some of these things I have let go and I never should have. Some of these things I have gained along the way. Some of them I have dropped. It is now time to combine them together. Maybe I should add swimmer and biker. I could go triathleting. We'll see.

On a professional level I realize that right now I need to find a position as a recruiter. Why? Because I am a gatekeeper. I am someone who can introduce two different parties. Which brings me to Saturday night!

Saturday night made me realize that I can bring important people together! I brought the person who was looking to have a good weekend get together just slightly west of the city in Waltham with the person who knew and lived in Waltham. I brought them together at some point. The friend in Waltham decided to host a party for what was dubbed as "Waltham Night" It was an epic night. Was it perfect? In no means it was but it was awesome.

I saw two of my friends break up this week. I love both of them very much. I know that I can't take sides. I also had the love of my life (to this point) tell me how much I hurt her. I was wrong and I'm not happy I hurt her. She is someone that I love and respect very much. Do these words mean that I want to get together again with? No. However it doesn't mean that I can dispose of her as a friend. Actually, her friendship is very important to me. It just takes time. I realize how our mutual friends feel. It's how I feel.

I do know that I have friends who love me and that I love. I have family that loves me. I'm happy and I have nothing to worry about. I have a roommate that got me home last night! I was a key that allowed those from the city enjoy the suburbs a bit! My Roommate said he had the most fun he has had quite a while. It's not Western Mass but it is not far off. I would say it is the gate to east and west and I now hold the key.

As for now, I'm just going to leave everything in the sun!



Zooey Deschanel, will you marry me?